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Dealing with Difficult People that are very negative means using your communication skills. Working with difficult people that I define as Negative Norms, can make you very downhearted. This means a high level of de-motivation for all other employees in the work setting. DEALING WITH DIFFICULT PEOPLE AND THEIR GOOD POINTS However, these Negative Norms can give you a very vital awareness of the pitfalls and problems from particular actions. They can be an essential barometer for being aware of problems that will appear long before others do. BALANCING UP AND DOWN OUTLOOKS In other articles we discuss Negative Norms who do see all negativity rather than the positives in a situation. However, it is important in a leadership and managerial role to be able to balance the extremely optimistic and pessimistic personalities that exist in a team. DEALING WITH DIFFICULT PEOPLE LIKE THIS You do need to know that often Negative Norms don't even know just how negative they really are and what affect it has on others. So it's vital to bring this to their attention. FEEDBACK TO OTHERS ABOUT NEGATIVITY You have to provide them with feedback. Yes you do. You need to give feedback otherwise they will not know. Often they haven't any idea how much negativity they are spreading. They see themselves as being cautious and giving great advice. They cannot see how others are feeling around them. They remain unaware that their persistent negativity is draining, distressing and demoralizing for their work colleagues. DEALING WITH PEOPLE CARDS AND YOU HAVE TO GIVE FEEDBACK Too frequently in dealing with people you just surmise that they are aware of how frustrating their behavior really is to others. But often they just don't have a clue and nobody ever lets them know. Nobody gives them any feedback on their behavior. COPING WITH DIFFICULT PEOPLE AND NO FEEDBACK For Negative Norms the only feedback they often receive is the passing comment "Oh you're always being negative". This is not feedback! It is a passing statement which does not help them or you. CONSTRUCTIVE FEEDBACK IN WORKING WITH DIFFICULT PEOPLE You have to provide constructive feedback. You have to calmly and in private, sit them down and explain that their constant use of this type of language and words is affecting you and others around them. It is critical that you explain to the them just what emotional reaction their negative language is having. DO NOT FOCUS ON THE PERSON BUT THE LANGUAGE Make sure not to focus on the person but the words they use. Explain how their language makes you and others around you feel. Explain that it is the frequency of the negative language that has a very distressing result. DIFFICULT PEOPLE FEEDBACK - BEGIN HERE Always strive to give very useful and constructive feedback to a difficult person who is excessively negative. This is the most important first step in assisting them to make changes in their thinking and behavior. WORKING WITH DIFFICULT PEOPLE AND FEEDBACK In further articles we'll consider more ways of helping those Negative Norms. But let's being with giving constructive feedback that they really need. Calm and considered feedback is essential in helping and dealing with difficult people.
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